wasssssssaaaaaaapppp???so i actually had the best of both worlds the past week..as the song goes: life's a bitch and then she dies. what an emotional roller coaster ride it was. laughter and then tears. damnit, what the hell would i do if A and the rest of the sisters werent there? i would have drowned myself in rocky road (though not a bad idea) except that i wouldnt wanna be back in chi-town looking like a fucking blob of fat or what have you. ----- i had a few tears to shed last week caused by situations beyond my control. i am not a mind-reader nor am i scientist good enough to calculate emotions and thinking of people. more than the tears were the times i had to throw up because i couldnt cry it all out. but at the end of the day, it were my loving sorority sisters, my protective brothers, the valiums (oh yes, those v's) and the loads of tequila (thank u jose cuervo!) that got me through.
if THIS one was THIS GOOD, i could hardly wait for the next. they always get better each time. but until then (yes, including when fritz' friends come over), i keep my heart to myself. ----- the lsac send-offs was a blast! had so much fun singing our "fraternity" hymn that i could hardly get the words outta my mouth. i hope that it will be a yearly tradition as gian and kanna pledged contributions for the next send-offs!
school send-offs was fun too. rommel and his team did a great job. felt like the nba finals! damnit im so addicted to basketball lol. i saw my romeo despite getting my heart trampled upon by the sight of his girl. heck, i dont give a fuck. ok, so i guess he aint my romeo after all. a gazillion questions creeped back into my mind. a whole lotta what-ifs. but is it too late to give an answer to all those questions? ----- finally saw jeremy play. damn what a dream come true. oh and that wave from the bench to the bleachers. *sigh* kept telling uncle jay what a dream come true jeremy was. lol im repeating myself here. he was telling us that he just raised his arms and slightly touched the other guy and the other guys mouth started bleeding and his tooth fell off. damn. wasnt jeremy's fault that jru players are too lame! anyway, they're leaving this thursday coz his papers arent fixed yet but theyd be spending christmas here to help jeremy settle down for good. first time in my entire life that id be cheering for the green side. must be good. lol. ----- im finally tired with waging war against KNS. no matter how i provoke her, she just wont bite. oh well. what can i say, the girl has no balls at all...as for her little minion (damnit, how the hell do u spell that word anyway?????????), she can kiss KNS's ass all she wants but when is start getting totally pissed at her, i'll make sure her world crumbles on her. yes, people, i am mean. and i am a bitch. ----- when people tell me that they dont understand me, i mentally tell them that i dont understand myself either. must be the years of medication that completely messed me up even more instead of helping me steady it all out. but im not ashamed of my past and of who i am now. why should i be? despite the hell that i have been through all my life, look at where i am now. i pulled it off just fine, didnt i? i mean, ask leah and the rest of the people who have known me way back when. ive come a long way. and i believe that i will still go places, at the rate im going. ----- lifes never fair. neither is love. but when things get going ur way, enjoy the ride. and when the rides over, it was fun while it lasted...now, u ask me, will it always be like that? the rides will keep ending? i think so. or at least until u find the person who will hold ur hand and walk with you...that way, u wouldnt have to ride no more :) ----- no goodbyes, please.
¶ 9:41:00 PM
ly get the words outta my mouth. i hope that it will be a yearly tradition as gian and kanna pledged contributions for the next send-offs!
9:41:00 PM 
